Because God is kind we do not always get what we want. In our flesh we will do an awful lot (and I mean that both ways) to get what we want. And when we get what our flesh so desperately wanted, do we not find that it’s not only unfulfilling but also self-defeating?
Cases abound. An effeminate man wants his lusts and finds another man to be his partner, and both of them are wrath-ed (Romans 1:26-27). A married man wants his anger and argues his position to the death, and though he wins his point he may lose his marriage. A mom communicates successfully that she just wants a little peace and quiet so that her kids can’t wait to get away and let her have her precious peace.
Adam got what he wanted when he ate the fruit and it killed him. Satan got what he wanted when God’s Son was crucified and he was nailing his own coffin shut.
It’s not hard to find examples. It is not easy to lose your life, but it is the only way to find it. Jesus Himself is the ultimate example, doing the Father’s will instead of His own, and that will prospered in His crucified hands (Isaiah 53:10-11). More than that, if we give Him our sinful wants He bears them for us and buries them that we might have something better.
I saw in my dream, that just as Christian came up with the cross, his burden loosed from off his shoulders, and fell from off his back, and began to tumble, and so continued to do, till it came to the mouth of the sepulchre, where it fell in, and I saw it no more. (John Bunyan, The Pilgrim’s Progress)
Confess your sins to Him. Let Him raise you to walk in newness of wants.